I was in the waiting room of my tax guy’s office when this very attractive man walked in and sat near my son and I. Jashar was discovering the water cooler. It was indeterminate whether the majority of the liquid surplus was ending up in his mouth rather than saturating his shirt or decorating the floor. The man walked outside then came back in with a lollipop to distract him. I could tell he had a nature equally as sweet as his ass. Definitely younger than me, at least from my perspective. As I was leaving with Jashar, he was outside waiting for us. He said his name was Luis. Luis told me that I was very beautiful and wanted to know if he could take me out sometime. I was very flattered and slightly flustered. I guess it’s pretty bold for a man to hit on a woman with a child under two in tow and this kid was for sure still in his 20’s. I always seem to attract the young ones. It seems to be my MO. Maybe it’s the type of energy I give off. I smiled nervously and told him that I thought he was very cute, but I was still involved with his father. He asked how involved. And I said very involved. He asked if he could take my number for maybe someday, and I gave it to him. I don’t know why I did…maybe it was for my ego that has been so desperately starved of that kind of attention lately. Maybe it was the butterflies I was feeling as my gaze discreetly made a full body scan traveling from his chiseled Latin features down his obvious muscular stature. Maybe it was the possibility of something different. An alternate reality with different feelings, sensations, and life altering outcomes…

Luis gave me butterflies, but it was much more than that. Luis gave me power. Power to choose an alternate destiny, to change what I know. He offered me a power I had not felt in a very long time. Luis represented a whole exciting slippery slope of opportunity and what ifs. I have a chance to alter my reality for better or worse and take responsibility for the consequences that I create if I chose to do so. The ball is is my court so to speak. Luis gave me a sense of control I was not expecting to be gifted with at 10 am on a Tuesday morning by an extremely attractive man. This type of control was very foreign to me. Even before my son I never took hold of those possibilities and let myself possess and experience it. I always let the man run the show, and lived in fear around that man of being the lesser for being alone. Maybe it was time for a change. Maybe it was time to take back some control.